My name is Katja Hrovat Schaale. I am a medical research scientist, a mother of two, and a European immigrant to Australia, where I moved seven years ago for my career.
Initially, I never wanted children. Having helped raise my two younger sisters, I felt I had already experienced motherhood.
I led an extremely active lifestyle. One of my concerns about moving to Australia was the lack of real mountains, not just hills. However, I enjoyed remote camping in the bush, where you need to bring your own water and there are no toilets, something difficult to do in Europe.
When discussing starting a family with my husband, he asked what changed my mind. My reason was simple: I wanted to share our amazing lifestyle with our kids, not because I wanted to feel complete, be pregnant, or because I liked babies (I don’t).
“I Didn’t Sign Up for This”
After my first child was born, I quickly returned to my old life within seven months. This included remote camping, pole dancing 2-3 times a week, hiking with my daughter on my back, maintaining a healthy sex life, having a great husband, and working at a job I loved. I was living the dream.
However, my life changed dramatically within a year, in ways I never anticipated. In October 2022, after the birth of my second child, I sustained irreversible physical trauma.
I was unaware of the risks associated with vaginal delivery, such as prolapse and other irreversible injuries. These were never discussed with me. I had two pregnancies, two vaginal deliveries, two Pitocin inductions, two epidurals, one episiotomy, an unstitched second-degree tear, and twice I declined the use of forceps. Yet, the risks were never communicated.
“Physical Trauma Causes Mental Issues”
Unlike some women who experience injuries after their first delivery, I had a period where the only trauma I faced was mental. After my first child, being able to pole dance again helped me overcome my mental issues from childbirth. But physical trauma is different.
Physical trauma leads to mental issues that cannot be fixed with pills or talking. It impacts every part of life: showering, taking kids to the park (which I can’t do alone), parenting, cooking, cleaning, friendships, sex life, marriage, and career.
I’ve spent over $8,000 on pelvic floor physiotherapy, psychological services, urogynecologists, GP appointments, Pilates, and will spend $14,000 on surgery to (hopefully) fix the damage.
“Sharing My Story is My Only Relief”
Sharing my story to inform women and help them make informed decisions is the only thing that helps me mentally. I am determined to fight for changes in how childbirth risks are communicated. The Australian Birth Trauma Association (ABTA) has been a great support, connecting me with others fighting the same battle.
I wish women were informed of all childbirth risks, regardless of delivery method. The romanticized idea of pregnancy and childbirth needs to be challenged. For most women, giving birth is the most dangerous thing they will ever do, and this needs to be acknowledged. Informed consent is the first step.
More Education Needed for Expectant Mothers
Organizations like ABTA advocate for education and training programs representing those with lived experiences, which healthcare providers should adopt. This can be achieved through continuous education and conversations with healthcare professionals during pregnancy to prepare for all possible scenarios in the birthing room.
