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Parents Who Use Humor Have Better Relationships with Their Kids

by daisy

In my household, when tensions ran high among us kids, my dad had a knack for diffusing the situation. Sometimes, he’d sit us down to talk through our feelings and resolve conflicts. Other times, he’d start a spontaneous food fight at dinner or whisk us away for an impromptu group dive into the backyard pool. Recent research indicates that such humor could be a key parenting skill.

A study published in the journal PLOS One surveyed approximately 300 individuals about their upbringing and parental interactions involving humor. Senior study author Dr. Benjamin Levi from Pennsylvania State College of Medicine noted that those raised by parents who used humor tended to have more positive views of their upbringing. They reported better relationships with their parents, perceived effective parenting, and expressed intentions to adopt similar techniques themselves.

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Dr. Katie Hurley, a senior clinical advisor at The Jed Foundation, cautioned that the study’s small sample size and lack of diversity among participants limit its generalizability. However, Levi emphasized that this research marks the beginning of a broader investigation into how humor impacts children’s development and parent-child relationships.

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Beyond simply eliciting laughter, humor serves vital roles in parenting, Levi explained. It can shift perspectives, strengthen connections, and aid in problem-solving between parents and children. Anne Libera, coauthor of the study and an associate professor at Columbia College Chicago, highlighted how humor can defuse negative moods and foster bonds that facilitate better problem-solving.

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Hurley added that humor also promotes language and literacy skills, creative problem-solving, and resilience in children. Moreover, it allows parents to reframe stressful situations and maintain a positive outlook.

However, Levi cautioned that humor is not a universal remedy and should be used judiciously. Its effectiveness hinges on factors like the child’s age, the nature of the issue at hand, and the intent behind the joke. Humor should never be used to diminish a child’s feelings or manipulate situations to the parent’s advantage, Libera advised.

When selecting appropriate humor for children, Hurley recommended aligning it with their developmental stage. For instance, younger children respond well to slapstick humor, while older children appreciate more sophisticated forms of wit.

Overall, Levi emphasized the importance of using humor to strengthen the parent-child bond and create a positive family environment. He underscored the need for parents to exercise sensitivity and avoid sarcasm or jokes that may inadvertently hurt or embarrass their children.

As research continues into the nuanced role of humor in parenting, experts advise that humor, when used thoughtfully, can be a powerful tool for building strong, resilient relationships within families.

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